I had planned on today being a good day. I had planned to be crafty and enjoy my family and listen to music and watch Parenthood and eat some good food and generally be happy.
Instead, I'm crying in bed while I write this post. Bear is taking care of Bean, and I'd stay in bed all day if I could. This week has been extra long and hard on me, emotionally and physically. I went to bed last night beyond exhausted and touched out. I woke up in tears and have been crying most of the morning. Part of it is that Bear has had to work extra this week. Another part, I feel like the doctors I've been seeing aren't taking my valid complaints seriously. Another? I was officially diagnosed with Hashimoto's. I've been working out for 3 weeks and even though I see inches falling away, the scale hasn't budged. Bean's been teething and nursing every 2 hours. (I love it most of the time, but sometimes I wish I could have 5 minutes to be a human being instead of a giant pillow/milk cow). Something triggered me over my birth trauma on FB and it blew up in my face and I got hurt because someone I didn't even know said some things that ended up not even being directed at me. I feel raw and vulnerable and in a deep despair. Hopefully a day doing my best to stick with my original plan will help get me out of this funk.
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AuthorMama Bear of one Baby Bear, Bean, who both love Papa Bear, and live in a crafty, gluten-free cozy den. Archives
June 2017
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